So 2018 has started off absolutely terrible for me.Worst beginning in all my years I could remember.No work,bills upon bills coming in and no income.This quickly brought on a feeling which I can only describe as depression,and it’s certainly not what you want during the winter in the country,in our new house.They say change is good,it is,but this felt like a kick in the teeth.Everything seemed to come at once.Murphy and his cousins I’ve heard Dave Ramsey mention.So right he was.I hit a low like never before and in all honesty it stated to consume me.In general I am a positive uplifting character,I read positive books,listen to inspirational audio but I have to tell you this situation knocked me down.I finally got scared.
Some will say that 3 months aren’t anything to worry about.Well,for someone like myself who has worked his entire life it is a big hit.
We dropped a sizable chunk for our down-payment and then all of a sudden everything that I was used to doing stopped working.I had to stop and look in the mirror and ask myself and the big man upstairs”what did I do wrong for this to happen”.Truth is,I didn’t do anything different.That’s the problem,when I should of been investing in my side hustle,I was wasting it elsewhere.I thought the well was saturated,nope,it was almost dry and I drained it.I dug myself in a hole without even knowing by not preparing for these situations.It was hard.It still is.Now I have to dig myself out of a hole that I willingly put myself in due to narrow vision.
What did I do?Well for starters I started looking for work,the kind desperate folks look for.Secondly I contacted my old boss and scheduled a sit down.It bears to say that we have a good relationship so it wasn’t as gut wrenching as one would think.So after the sit down,I’m glad to say that my 20 years of service mean jack shit but at least I have a steady income for a while and this time my little bit of extra income will go to the side hustle and get this project of mine finally off the ground.I still got my customers that I am grateful for and still continue to expand,plus wherever I am needed I try to accommodate.
Listen,after doing some deep reflecting on my past careers,I have realized that I always chased the stars that were close to the ground.I stuck around long enough but never past the line. Every time I got comfortable I left.Now it feels like I have to start over again,at my age and in my situation,it hurts.
So I came to the conclusion that 2018 is not going to be my best year but I will make it the best that I possibly can. I’ve been knocked down before,but never on both knees,so for me to give in to a mediocre life in 2018 is unheard of.
Much sacrifices will have to be made,mainly spare-time and sleep,but with momentum and inspiration I will be able to handle this gracefully.And caffeine.
Ultimately I feel better knowing that there is a steady flow of income coming in for my time,which helps starve the depression. Temporarily. I keep telling myself this year is the year I launch my side hustle,I guess when your back is against the wall,wallet drained of all but lint it just might be the motivator that I need.
So look out for the broken down man with a smile,the tired soul with hope and the dreamer with a plan.If you see me and I seem lost,it’s nothing personal.I’m just strategizing on how to overcome another obstacle.2018,hit me with your best shot,I’ll be waiting.
-Striving for a better life,again.Stranger of MTL.pexels-photo-636164.jpeg

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